johnke.me

Sinners

Poster for Sinners
Watched on April 24, 2025
Rating:

The “piercing the veil” sequence totally captured me. Astonishing and overwhelming. It’s not surprising that Ludwig Göransson is listed as an executive producer here - music is every bit as important in the storytelling as any of the actors’ performances (which, it should be said, are also across the board incredible). It’s also refreshing to see a modern blockbuster genre film where the credits for the musicians are as long as the credits for vfx.

Best American vampire film since Near Dark.

Return to Oz

Poster for Return to Oz
Watched on April 23, 2025
Rating:

Often overlooked compared to its genre contemporaries like Labyrinth, this is a wonderful inventive piece of filmmaking that deserves a better reputation. Obviously, inviting comparisons to one of Hollywood’s original and brightest darlings is a tall ask. And Return to Oz does itself no favours: instead of the technicolour oomph of the original film, this has a more gritty realism that could almost feel like a betrayal of expectations from an ‘Oz’ film. But it acts as a vital counterweight to the fantasy elements. In Return, the world of Oz feels more grounded and dangerous, not entirely dreamlike and safe. This means the antagonists here are extra terrifying, especially to younger eyes ‐ the Wheelers and Mombi and two of most terrifying villains ever put into a kid’s movie. But it also means that the moments of whimsy, the visual style such as character design of Jack Pumpkinhead and Tik-Tok, feel even more grounded and real and special.

Watched this with my kids and they loved it.

A Few Good Men

Poster for A Few Good Men
Watched on April 21, 2025
Rating:

Opens with a Busby Berkeley dance number but instead of dancers with feathers, we get marines with rifles. And ends with a cheesy “The End” card. Feels like the last gasp of Old Hollywood. Wonderful stuff.

Worth pointing out that although Tom Cruise is more than capable enough to handle the intense sequences, he really, really struggles with the lighter stuff. There’s a couple of bits where his character has to do basic relatable, human shit like “tell a joke” and, god bless him, the poor guy is really trying but never quite gets there.

A History of the World: Part I

Poster for A History of the World: Part I
Watched on April 19, 2025
Rating:

There are a couple of flashes of brilliance to be found here but unfortunately you have to wade through an unforgivable amount of bullshit to find them.

Libro.fm is selling AI slop

In an effort to de-Bezos myself, I canceled my Audible subscription and switched over to libro.fm. It doesn’t have nearly the same depth of catalogue as Audible, but they only sell DRM-free audiobooks AND you can nominate a bookshop to support, so a portion of every purchase I make goes towards a local Irish children’s bookshop. Nice!

The other night, I saw they were selling what they claimed was The Iliad translated by Emily Wilson and I bought it immediately, despite the fact there were a lot of things that really should have made me suspicious:

  1. The terrible cover art that doesn’t even mention Emily Wilson The cover of this version of The Iliad, as it appears on libro.fm
  2. The author, “Nathan Brooks”, has mainly only narrated Keto diet books (we’ll come back to Devolution and Meister der Angst) A search for the narrator “Nathan Brooks”

From the first line, it was obvious this was not the Emily Wilson translation. This was the public-domain, hundred-year-old (and fairly trash) Lang, Leaf and Myers translation. Yikes!

But I also started to suspect this was AI narration. A painfully flat affect, unnatural intonations, and two completely different pronunciations of “Atreides” (a name that, incidentally, doesn’t even appear in the Wilson translation). Every line ends in a semi-questionmark which is a trick used by stochastic parrots to gain some wiggle-room and maybe make it sound like they understand the meaning of the words they’re saying. This illusion works reasonably well in short bursts, but they were trying to do it across a 15 hour book?

Paradox Audios

I started looking into the publisher, “Paradox Audios”. Libro.fm are selling at least nine books from this publisher. And they all have a few things in common.

  1. These are all public domain works
  2. The narrator has never narrated anything before
  3. All published between February and March 2025
  4. The bland, formulaic artwork.
  5. Over-thesaurus’d summaries/descriptions with the adjective dial turned all the way up

Take a listen to the sample of "Door in the Wall" narrated by “Samuel Grant”. Now listen to "The Canon of Sherlock Holmes" narrated by “Thomas Jenkins”. That is the exact same voice. Also, Thomas Jenkins has never narrated anything before, and the first book he’s reading is a 65 hour epic? Not a chance.

Any one of these is fishy enough, but all together, it’s obvious this “publisher” is clearly someone who is just churning out AI slop and selling it to audiobook sellers. And it’s kind of working! As of writing (2025-04-19), their versio of The Iliad is #4 in Libro.fm’s list of bestsellers in the “Poetry” category, behind Ian Mackellen reading The Odyssey but ahead of Stephen Fry’s Troy (read by Stephen Fry).

Libro’s response to AI

In a thoughtful blog post published in October last year, Libro addressed the issue of AI narration. They said:

We are actively taking steps to increase transparency around audiobooks that are AI-narrated by properly labeling them on our site and in our apps. As an audiobook retailer and app, we are not involved in the production AI-narrated audiobooks; so labelling them requires collaboration with our publishing partners.

Which is fair enough, I think!

And in their defence, I wrote to them to let them know my issues with the version of The Iliad I had purchased and they immediately issued a refund and said they’d shared my email with their content team and they’d be looking into the books from Paradox Audios.

Not just Libro.fm

But it’s not just Libro.fm. Kobo also has the Paradox Audios version of The Iliad. So does Apple Books. Do you know who doesn’t have it? Audible. (Probably because they locked down exclusive rights to the actual Wilson translations of The Iliad and The Odyssey).

What it feels like, to me, is that in order to compete with Audible, the other audiobook sellers are turning to these no-name, unscrupulous publishers to bulk out their catalogue. And it’s making their product worse.

So short-sighted. I really do want to support independent booksellers as best I can, and I would much rather Libro just say “Yeah we don’t have it”, rather serving up this dreadful slop.

Since I’m on the subject of Libro.fm, I just wanted to touch on something I mentioned earlier. Remember I talked about the other books coming up when you search for Nathan Brooks as a narrator? Rather than giving each narrator a unique ID and attaching that to the credit, Libro do a fuzzy search. So not only is the AI “Nathan Brooks” from The Iliad NOT the same as the one that read those Keto books (one is English, the other American), books like Meister der Angst also turn up in the search results. These are books with a whole cast of narrators and we’re matching partial names. In this case, “David Nathan” and “Farina Brock”. Not even close! But it makes these sketchy narrators look more legit, at least from a cursory glance.

Austin Powers in Goldmember

Poster for Austin Powers in Goldmember
Watched on April 17, 2025
Rating:

Goldmember is not substantively worse than any of the other Austin Powers films. It follows the exact same formula, with variations of the same jokes (they even joke about the expected, inevitable “Johnson” joke). But the franchise was just running out of steam at this point and people had moved on, I guess. Made me laugh out loud a couple of times, but I wasn’t proud of having laughed.

Also I feel stupid for saying this but I didn’t get the whole Goldmember gag. The entirety of the joke appeared to be “Dutch people have funny accents”?

Christine

Poster for Christine
Watched on April 15, 2025
Rating:

Adolescence for the 1980s.

I love how everyone is watching cartoons in this. Shooting up and then watching Bananaman.

Twin Peaks: Fire Walk With Me

Poster for Twin Peaks: Fire Walk With Me
Watched on April 15, 2025
Rating:

(I’m working on a first-time watch of Twin Peaks and I’ve finally made it to Fire Walk With Me.)

Is this what David Lynch always wanted Twin Peaks to be like? Was Mark Frost holding him back? Did they just decide to go with what the 18 certification would let them get away with? All of the above?

The show has its moments of real nightmarishness (especially season two) but it’s dialled all the way up here. Sheryl Lee, given such short shrift in the TV series, is given so much more to do here and she handles it beautifully. A thoroughly demented, fragile performance.